On August 23, 2013 Richard Ryan Laubach was bound over to the 4th Judicial Court on one count of First Degree Murder. That being the murder of 22 month old Joseph W. Graham III - my grandson. If you read the previous post you found links to the two news articles that were published in the Mountain Home News that gave a pretty darn good review of what took place in the Preliminary Hearing on August 16th and 23rd.
This morning (September 3, 2013) we were in the same courthouse, same court room but before a District Court Judge for the arraignment. I guess some small glimmer of hope resided in me that he would just put this nightmare to rest quicker for all of us and plead guilty - but of course that did not happen. A plea of "Not Guilty" was entered and he waived his right to think over that plea entry for one day - so it is official - even after all the testimony given by the forensic pathologist and the child abuse pediatric expert - he is going to fight this all the way through a jury trial.
We have walked (and sometimes crawled) a very emotional and difficult path these past several months. From the two days at the hospital, to funeral homes, meetings with law enforcement, the military and the prosecutor's office, the ups and downs of approaching court dates, the Preliminary Hearing and now the District Court Arraignment. So we have made it around two of the big curves on this winding road. And now we begin the next leg in the journey.
As the Judge read the charges and listed the minimum and maximum penalties associated to the 1st Degree Murder charge I realized that no matter how many times I hear the charges read I'm never going to be able to just sit and listen. It stops me in my tracks every time. My heart pounds and my eyes water and someone told me outside of the courthouse today - "you have to quit holding your breath during court, five weeks at trial without breathing isn't going to work." I guess I just hold it in to keep from crying.
After the plea was entered the Judge, Prosecutor and Defense Attorney began the task of checking calendars and setting court dates for Status Hearings, Pre-Trial Conferences and the Trial. The Trial date will most likely change though, so I am told, so I'm not going to focus too much on that date for now. Instead we will just work towards each of the other hearings/conferences schedule between now and the first of the year.
The holiday season will be upon before long and for my family they will never be the same as years past. I know this first Thanksgiving and Christmas will be the hardest and that things will get easier as time goes on. But how do put a smile on your face and have a happy time when a very big part of your family is no longer there and your daughter is not who she was a few short months ago and never will be again? Joey's death touched all of us and has had large impacts on all of us, not just the adults but the kids too. Will my youngest son ever be who he was again? Or has Joey's death changed him forever? Only time, love, patience and understanding will tell. Will Joey's mommy ever have a time where there are no more night terrors? I don't know. And as a Mom these things break my heart even more. Because Mom is the one to fix everything right? Mom is the one who knows the answers and finds the path to make things right again. But this time Mom can't do that for anyone. Not my daughter, not my youngest son, not for any of my other children, my other grandchildren or anyone else. The day Joey died I lost my grandson, but I also lost my daughter, because a piece of her died with Joey.
All I can tell you is to STOP....stop and love your family....play with the kids in your family...with the children of your friends.....enjoy every single moment with them...watch them as they learn something new every day....the wonderment and joy in their eyes as they see or taste or touch something new....share their excitement in their success at school or sports or for beating that level on their favorite video game that they have been struggling with....and take pictures....lots and lots of pictures. My daughter took sooooooooooo many pictures of Joey through his 22 months on this Earth and I am so very thankful for that. Because you see there are never going to be any more pictures of Joey. The last one taken a few days before he died is it. There will be no school pictures, no sports pictures, no pictures from dances, prom or graduation.
I could not get through these days and nights without some amazing people in my life. I thank the Lord above for all of you and I pray each day that He keep you and yours safe and well.
Grandma Kathy
This morning (September 3, 2013) we were in the same courthouse, same court room but before a District Court Judge for the arraignment. I guess some small glimmer of hope resided in me that he would just put this nightmare to rest quicker for all of us and plead guilty - but of course that did not happen. A plea of "Not Guilty" was entered and he waived his right to think over that plea entry for one day - so it is official - even after all the testimony given by the forensic pathologist and the child abuse pediatric expert - he is going to fight this all the way through a jury trial.
We have walked (and sometimes crawled) a very emotional and difficult path these past several months. From the two days at the hospital, to funeral homes, meetings with law enforcement, the military and the prosecutor's office, the ups and downs of approaching court dates, the Preliminary Hearing and now the District Court Arraignment. So we have made it around two of the big curves on this winding road. And now we begin the next leg in the journey.
As the Judge read the charges and listed the minimum and maximum penalties associated to the 1st Degree Murder charge I realized that no matter how many times I hear the charges read I'm never going to be able to just sit and listen. It stops me in my tracks every time. My heart pounds and my eyes water and someone told me outside of the courthouse today - "you have to quit holding your breath during court, five weeks at trial without breathing isn't going to work." I guess I just hold it in to keep from crying.
After the plea was entered the Judge, Prosecutor and Defense Attorney began the task of checking calendars and setting court dates for Status Hearings, Pre-Trial Conferences and the Trial. The Trial date will most likely change though, so I am told, so I'm not going to focus too much on that date for now. Instead we will just work towards each of the other hearings/conferences schedule between now and the first of the year.
The holiday season will be upon before long and for my family they will never be the same as years past. I know this first Thanksgiving and Christmas will be the hardest and that things will get easier as time goes on. But how do put a smile on your face and have a happy time when a very big part of your family is no longer there and your daughter is not who she was a few short months ago and never will be again? Joey's death touched all of us and has had large impacts on all of us, not just the adults but the kids too. Will my youngest son ever be who he was again? Or has Joey's death changed him forever? Only time, love, patience and understanding will tell. Will Joey's mommy ever have a time where there are no more night terrors? I don't know. And as a Mom these things break my heart even more. Because Mom is the one to fix everything right? Mom is the one who knows the answers and finds the path to make things right again. But this time Mom can't do that for anyone. Not my daughter, not my youngest son, not for any of my other children, my other grandchildren or anyone else. The day Joey died I lost my grandson, but I also lost my daughter, because a piece of her died with Joey.
All I can tell you is to STOP....stop and love your family....play with the kids in your family...with the children of your friends.....enjoy every single moment with them...watch them as they learn something new every day....the wonderment and joy in their eyes as they see or taste or touch something new....share their excitement in their success at school or sports or for beating that level on their favorite video game that they have been struggling with....and take pictures....lots and lots of pictures. My daughter took sooooooooooo many pictures of Joey through his 22 months on this Earth and I am so very thankful for that. Because you see there are never going to be any more pictures of Joey. The last one taken a few days before he died is it. There will be no school pictures, no sports pictures, no pictures from dances, prom or graduation.
I could not get through these days and nights without some amazing people in my life. I thank the Lord above for all of you and I pray each day that He keep you and yours safe and well.
Grandma Kathy