Tonight while searching for something on the internet I wondered if there had been any mention in the Mountain Home News about the bond hearing that was recently held for the murderer of my grandson Joey. After not finding anything in that paper I decided to just do a search on the murderers name and came across a new site that was put up by his mother. A new attempt to raise money to help pay for the legal expenses for her son. That's fine, you have every right to try and raise money since you have now hired a private attorney to defend him.
So where is my anger and outrage coming from? From the things this woman has put in her write up in attempt to get people to donate money to their cause. A few quotes from her new plea for donations....
"I was posting updates atRally for Ryan, but due the harassment and graphic nature of some of the emails (mostly from a limited number of friends and family of my sons wife, yes they are still married) concerning threats to my family and so forth I was unable to continue." Seriously lady? Threats to your family? Not from my family. And truly, if you thought you were being threatened then why didn't you go to the police? Because it's a pack of lies! (anger starts here can you tell?)
"It has been brought to my attention, that despite my desire to see my son personally and not via computer model and to physically hug him instead of sending 'BMH' (Big Mental Hugs) that to bail him out of jail could possible cost him his life. Death threats remain in the jail as well as within the community due to the types of associations that my son's in laws have." Due to the types of associations that her son's in laws have? Hmmmm, ok who are these bad ass people that I apparently have associations with? How dare you blame threats made against your son back at my family! And pardon me if I can't sympathize over your wanting to see your son personally and to physically hug him.....at least your son is still breathing.....see my daughter would love to hug her son again, she would love to see him in more than just photographs and videos...but you see that's all she will ever have -- there are no more photographs to come, no more videos, no more talks, there will never be a phone conversation or an email between them. Maybe you should wake up to reality and maybe read the transcripts from the two day preliminary hearing, where your son changed his "story" a dozen times, where the doctors described the multiple injuries that my little grandson suffered, where the doctors explained that these injuries could not happen from a fall. Do you not understand how someone that kills a child is one of the lowest forms of scum even in jail and prison? And believe me I don't want your son dead. No one in my family wants that to happen. We want him in court where we will see justice on earth served. (yep more anger building here)
"...trial was originally scheduled to start January 2014, yet a key piece if evidence had never been explored. So the trial was moved and to begin end of March 2014. Once again another problem occurred.... As of December 2013, Ryan's original the attorney, the Public Defender, who by the way has defended different members of his wife's family, had yet to speak to or secure any experts... We got nervous and hired private attorneys." Key piece of evidence had never been explored? Ummm, not true but OK, regardless it was explored again...and tested and results were negative (again)! Public Defender defended different members of my family? Well yeah I know of one member of the family that he probably defended, so what? He's the county public defender, that's his job. Public Defender had yet to speak to or secure any experts? Really? Might want to get your facts straight once again because that isn't the case and everyone that has been in that courtroom for the countless number of status hearings between September and now knows the truth on that subject. (Frustration here because I am sick of the way this woman twists the truth to suit her needs)
"Ryan has now been in jail for over a year and has been attempting to cope with this tragic accident with no counseling and / or therapy and is now possibly suffering from sIde affects due the traumatic situation" OUTRAGE! Are you serious? You want us to feel bad for him? What about my daughter? What about Joey's dad? They had their son ripped away from them at the hands of your son! What about me? I lost my grandson and a part of my daughter thanks to your son! What about the rest of Joey's family? Do you not think that we have suffered every single day since this happened? Possibly suffering from side affects? Really? NOTHING...NOT ONE DAMN THING will ever compare to what my daughter has to deal with for the rest of her life.
As a mother I can understand being there to support your child, to let them know you love them and are there for them. But there also are times where you love your child but accept the harsh reality of things. What parent would ever imagine their child capable of such brutality? None that I can think of. When Joey was first admitted to St. Luke's Boise I started contacting family to let them know they should get here as soon as they could to say goodbye. One of those calls was to Ryan's parents. While many friends and family had a hard time with them being at the hospital Erin wanted them there, and I welcomed them when they arrived. They saw his little body, they cried for him. In court they heard the same things we heard, yet they still insist this was a "tragic accident" and say so many other things. I'm not in their shoes, I don't know what it is like to be the parent of someone accused of such a horrific crime. So I pray for them. I try to have compassion for them. I admit that at times it is hard. I mean ....REALLY hard....but I keep trying. But my focus also isn't on them every day nor on Ryan. My focus is on my family and my focus is on Justice for Joey.
We'll continue to get angry, we'll continue to get outraged. We'll also continue to show compassion, we'll continue to speak out, we'll continue to love, to cry, to laugh, to hug, to sit quietly, to remember and to share Joey with the world. And I'll continue to write.
Love your children, play with them every day and keep those cameras close by, take lots and lots of pictures. And do this grandma a favor -- when you tuck them into bed at night after reading this -- kiss them once for me and Joey as well.
With anger, outrage, compassion and love,
Grandma Kathy
So where is my anger and outrage coming from? From the things this woman has put in her write up in attempt to get people to donate money to their cause. A few quotes from her new plea for donations....
"I was posting updates atRally for Ryan, but due the harassment and graphic nature of some of the emails (mostly from a limited number of friends and family of my sons wife, yes they are still married) concerning threats to my family and so forth I was unable to continue." Seriously lady? Threats to your family? Not from my family. And truly, if you thought you were being threatened then why didn't you go to the police? Because it's a pack of lies! (anger starts here can you tell?)
"It has been brought to my attention, that despite my desire to see my son personally and not via computer model and to physically hug him instead of sending 'BMH' (Big Mental Hugs) that to bail him out of jail could possible cost him his life. Death threats remain in the jail as well as within the community due to the types of associations that my son's in laws have." Due to the types of associations that her son's in laws have? Hmmmm, ok who are these bad ass people that I apparently have associations with? How dare you blame threats made against your son back at my family! And pardon me if I can't sympathize over your wanting to see your son personally and to physically hug him.....at least your son is still breathing.....see my daughter would love to hug her son again, she would love to see him in more than just photographs and videos...but you see that's all she will ever have -- there are no more photographs to come, no more videos, no more talks, there will never be a phone conversation or an email between them. Maybe you should wake up to reality and maybe read the transcripts from the two day preliminary hearing, where your son changed his "story" a dozen times, where the doctors described the multiple injuries that my little grandson suffered, where the doctors explained that these injuries could not happen from a fall. Do you not understand how someone that kills a child is one of the lowest forms of scum even in jail and prison? And believe me I don't want your son dead. No one in my family wants that to happen. We want him in court where we will see justice on earth served. (yep more anger building here)
"...trial was originally scheduled to start January 2014, yet a key piece if evidence had never been explored. So the trial was moved and to begin end of March 2014. Once again another problem occurred.... As of December 2013, Ryan's original the attorney, the Public Defender, who by the way has defended different members of his wife's family, had yet to speak to or secure any experts... We got nervous and hired private attorneys." Key piece of evidence had never been explored? Ummm, not true but OK, regardless it was explored again...and tested and results were negative (again)! Public Defender defended different members of my family? Well yeah I know of one member of the family that he probably defended, so what? He's the county public defender, that's his job. Public Defender had yet to speak to or secure any experts? Really? Might want to get your facts straight once again because that isn't the case and everyone that has been in that courtroom for the countless number of status hearings between September and now knows the truth on that subject. (Frustration here because I am sick of the way this woman twists the truth to suit her needs)
"Ryan has now been in jail for over a year and has been attempting to cope with this tragic accident with no counseling and / or therapy and is now possibly suffering from sIde affects due the traumatic situation" OUTRAGE! Are you serious? You want us to feel bad for him? What about my daughter? What about Joey's dad? They had their son ripped away from them at the hands of your son! What about me? I lost my grandson and a part of my daughter thanks to your son! What about the rest of Joey's family? Do you not think that we have suffered every single day since this happened? Possibly suffering from side affects? Really? NOTHING...NOT ONE DAMN THING will ever compare to what my daughter has to deal with for the rest of her life.
As a mother I can understand being there to support your child, to let them know you love them and are there for them. But there also are times where you love your child but accept the harsh reality of things. What parent would ever imagine their child capable of such brutality? None that I can think of. When Joey was first admitted to St. Luke's Boise I started contacting family to let them know they should get here as soon as they could to say goodbye. One of those calls was to Ryan's parents. While many friends and family had a hard time with them being at the hospital Erin wanted them there, and I welcomed them when they arrived. They saw his little body, they cried for him. In court they heard the same things we heard, yet they still insist this was a "tragic accident" and say so many other things. I'm not in their shoes, I don't know what it is like to be the parent of someone accused of such a horrific crime. So I pray for them. I try to have compassion for them. I admit that at times it is hard. I mean ....REALLY hard....but I keep trying. But my focus also isn't on them every day nor on Ryan. My focus is on my family and my focus is on Justice for Joey.
We'll continue to get angry, we'll continue to get outraged. We'll also continue to show compassion, we'll continue to speak out, we'll continue to love, to cry, to laugh, to hug, to sit quietly, to remember and to share Joey with the world. And I'll continue to write.
Love your children, play with them every day and keep those cameras close by, take lots and lots of pictures. And do this grandma a favor -- when you tuck them into bed at night after reading this -- kiss them once for me and Joey as well.
With anger, outrage, compassion and love,
Grandma Kathy